I've been going to the gym for about three weeks now, and I'm compelled to contemplate my limitations with great self-compassion, and my breakthroughs with great self-reverence. I continue to push my physical and psychological limits like a motherfucker; I went from believing to be inadequate to becoming a waitress who serves hundreds of different people a month, face to face, sometimes heart to heart. I went from the fearfulness of monetary scarcity to the fruits of working my ass off to attain fair money - and more than often less than I work for. Taking care of my self - from a chiropractic alignment to a gym and a trainer, to the soon-to-be eye-checking that will endow me with tools to look at the world cristalinamente. My home is standing, and on the rise. I must only trust myself.
The time to sell myself short is coming to a certain end. I always thought that self-realization would take a most-favoured shape, applauded by those whom I love, appreciate and admire, but I'm beginning to realize that though it is a process we all go through as human beings, I must walk through it and dig down its marvelous and terrifying depths alone. I can't help but remember the elder days where I was free from all the bullshit of the world, and in my heart I knew the greater truths of freedom and compassion and transcendence to be a reality - but truth is, I'm not there right now. Awareness comes and goes, though it is always there. I accept the place in which I am right now, and I'm open to the greater possibilities that are to come, activated by my power.
I also realize my briefness and broadness. It comes with the turning of the knob and the pushing of the door of my true Self. Vulnerability will come in due time.
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